This one’s for all the parents out there. Do you ever feel like the whole world is judging you for your parenting? Especially if you’re a working mom, you probably feel overwhelmed sometimes. You are not alone! Especially when we have young ones, there’s this pressure to be controlling your kids and parenting perfectly. I want to share a story that really struck a chord in me.
Recently, my company had our annual holiday party.
We all gathered at a bowling alley this year to celebrate, and everyone’s family was encouraged to come. My office manager, Roxie, organized everything. She threw an absolute fabulous party, and she managed every part. Roxie handled the food, the venue, and the employees. She even made little personalized awards for everyone. And she also had her kids at the party. They’re quite young, about 2 and 6.
As the party went on, I could see her getting more and more stressed. I could just feel how much anxiety she was having as she chased the kids around. I took a moment to acknowledge her because she’s incredible. Roxie does so much and was handling everything perfectly, but she was really stressing over making sure the kids were behaving. I pulled her aside at that moment to tell her she was doing great!
And now, I tell you the secret to parenting:
If you’re a young mom, especially a working one, I take this moment to say: You’re also doing great. No one’s bothered by your kids. It doesn’t matter if they’re too hyper, or out of control at the grocery store. Even on the best of days, we all struggle as parents and do the best we can in every moment. Our best in each moment is all we can do.
I started my business at age 24. My kids were just babies at that point and I always had to tow them around with me. I’m sure you can imagine how insecure I felt going to business meetings with my kids. I felt like I was failing because I struggled to juggle these things. When my boys were little, I used to feel like all the eyes were on me and judging me.
I realized that we all go through these things. So after that party, I knew I just needed to take a moment here and say to everybody, especially Roxie: You’re doing a good job. Your kids are supposed to run around and act wild. That’s what kids do. For Roxie to manage the 20-30 people at this party and pass out all those beautiful awards, all while trying to watch her kids, I could feel the stress.
If you resonate with this, if you feel that pressure to be perfect in your parenting, just know you’re doing great. Here’s the secret: No one is judging you. You’re judging yourself. For those wonderful parents, spouses, or employees who manage everything, just know that you deserve an award. To help you stay positive when you feel judged and overwhelmed, I’ve created a worksheet, which you can download here. Keep your head up. You got this!